Aesthetic Realism is a cult

  Who they are, how they operate • Written by former members

What former members say...

They reeled me in like a brook trout... Guilt was introduced into the experience. They told me I was "not showing respect for this great education I was receiving" by continuing to avoid having consultations.

They flatter you to death and tell you that you're so wonderful, and you have all these qualities that others have never seen. And then there's this horrible criticizing.

My new AR friends were starting to apply the hard sell a bit more so the word "cult" did come to mind, but I naïvely believed that it couldn't be a cult because it wasn't religious in nature.

They get you to actually control yourself. A lot of people's lives have been hurt -- ruined.

So, there was Eli Siegel, who came up with all these rules, but to whom none of the rules applied, and there was everybody else.

[Eli Siegel] was a hurtful person. He was a sociopath. He was a control freak, and he was a cult leader.

Poor John then would be the subject of an onslaught of criticism to help him see his own contempt for Eli Siegel.... This is merely one example of the way people were controlled and humiliated if they stepped out of line or didn't conform to accepted behavior.

We all had to present ourselves as essentially miserable failures whose lives were in shambles until we found the glorious "answers to all our questions" in AR.

It was very difficult for me to surrender to AR in the total fashion they seemed to want.

I received a call from one of the AR bigwigs asking me to donate money to the foundation.  When I told him I was low on cash I received a considerable verbal drubbing.

I consider my "study" of Aesthetic Realism to be one of the factors that led to the eventual breakup of my marriage, to my eternal sorrow.

I felt a bit raped psychologically.... If you are thinking of getting into the AR consultation process, realize that they could end it all suddenly, and that you could find your most intimate thoughts on tape in someone else's possession.

If there is anything the Aesthetic Realists are good at, it is convincing people that if they think they see anything wrong with Siegel, AR, Reiss or how the organization is run, there is really something wrong with them. Any time I began to question things or think I saw something amiss, I had been programmed to think that what it really meant was that something was terribly wrong with me.

That's when I finally knew for sure: AESTHETIC REALISM IS A CULT.  I swore on that moment that if I was ever given the opportunity to tell the world what these people did to me, I would.

When I left I was definitely shunned by other students. I would meet people in the NYC streets - as I still do to this day - and they would turn the other way to avoid me, or some even made derogatory comments about me.

[New AR students] would be shocked if they knew that the lives of the people they are supposed to learn from are very different from the principles they are taught in consultations. Even though publicly the Aesthetic Realism foundation preaches respect for people and like of the world, inside the organization the message is very different. The underlying feeling is, "People who do not study AR are inferior to us, and the world is our enemy, out to get us." We had contempt for outsiders and were scared of the world. We huddled together for safety, secure in our sense of superiority.

When I was studying, we were allowed to associate with our families only if they continuously demonstrated that they were grateful to and respectful of Eli Siegel and AR. This did not include going to visit them if they lived far away because then we would have had to miss classes, and that would have meant we were "making our family more important than AR."

Some of the students I remember going at most intensely and viciously to stop them from associating with their families, (and whom we succeeded in stopping for many, many years), are people who are now bragging on the AR website about how great their relationships with their families are and writing as though that was always the case.

There were even instances of students refusing to visit their parents when one of them was dying because the parents did not "express regret" and renounce their unfairness to Eli Siegel and AR. There were parents who literally begged their son or daughter to relent so they could see them one more time, but the child refused. The parent died without ever seeing their child again. Far from being criticized for such behavior, students who went this far were seen as heroes in AR. They received public praise from Ellen Reiss.

While I was in AR, I did believe that Eli Siegel was greater than Christ.... It would have been accurate to say I worshipped him.

People were told that if their families did not support aesthetic realism, they were not their families.

Some of the people with statements on the Countering the Lies website claiming that AR students do not shun former students have actually passed me on the street, looked straight at me, and pretended they were seeing right through me. This includes people in the highest positions in the organization.

More and more the AR zombies demanded that I express gratitude to ES and AR. Every paper that a student wrote had to end with the obligatory "I am so grateful to ES and AR for..." along with "I deeply regret that I have met this great knowledge with contempt..."

Eli Siegel was an evil person. And I don't use the word evil lightly.

See former members' statements in their entirety

Like all cults, Aesthetic Realists believe their founder was the greatest person ever to live, that his writings are more important than the Bible, and that he came up with the One True Answer for the world. The biggest sin one can commit in the group is to show insufficient "gratitude" for the founder or for Aesthetic Realism itself.  Members are expected to recruit family and friends, and generally have to cut off relations with family members whom they can't get to join (or with family and friends who join for a while, but then leave).  The group effectively controls every significant aspect of their members' lives — right down to whom they can marry.  But what AR is best known for is its alleged cure for homosexuality, which it was embarrassed into giving up after so many of the "cured" fell off the wagon. (Naturally, the cure involves professing undying devotion to the founder and his teachings.) And like most cults, the Aesthetic Realists also suffer from delusions of grandeur, obsessive paranoia, and wildly hysterical reaction to any criticism.

It's not the teachings of Aesthetic Realism that make it a cult, and most former members aren't critical of the AR philosophy itself.  What makes it a cult is the fact that the members are fanatically devoted to those teachings (to the point that they renounce their relationships with their families), and that the members are brainwashed, which means they've lost the ability to realize certain things which are obvious to everyone else.

It's not just me saying Aesthetic Realism is a cult. It's also dozens of other former members whose stories are published here, well-known professional psychologists and cult experts (like Steve Hassan), and the media.  New York Magazine and New York Native both called AR a cult, and Harper's referred to them as "the Moonies of poetry". You can read what all these sources say about AR on this site.

But my best evidence against the Aesthetic Realists is what they say themselves. From their books, their letters, their newspaper ads, their private therapy sessions, and their secret meetings (which they blunderingly recorded to tape), the world can see how mean-spirited, dishonest, and out of touch with reality they really are.

None of this would be an issue of the Aesthetic Realists were just a harmless group of eccentrics, but they're not harmless: They hurt people. They hurt the families who have lost a loved one to the group (and have thus lost meaningful contact with them), and they hurt the members themselves, many of whom say they needed a considerable amount of therapy to recover from their experience after they left.

There's lots of stuff on this site, but perhaps the most relevant are:

• The cult aspects of Aesthetic Realism
• The ultimate statement by a former member
• An article by a journalist who infiltrated the group to learn how they operate
  

If you're a former member, I hope you'll share your story.

If you're a current member, I hope you'll consider leaving.

If you're a journalist or blogger, I hope you'll write about this scandalous group.

 Thanks for stopping by. -- Michael Bluejay, editor

• Recovering from your Aesthetic Realism experience.  Here's a list of books, counselors, and other resources to help you cope with what you went through. (December 2011) (more...)
• "Aesthetic Realism — a crackpot cult lodged down in the woodwork in Greenwich Village".  The Arts Editor of New York Magazine doesn't pull any punches! (November 2011) (more...)
• "The Victims of Aesthetic Realism".  We tracked down an old article by a journalist who infiltrated AR to discover the group's methods of mind control.  Powerful, scary stuff. (November 2011) (more...)
• Growing up in Aesthetic Realism.  My own mother finally breaks her silence and describes what it was like to be born into a cult. (February 2011) (more...)
• "There isn't any question:  Eli Siegel killed himself."  A former member who had sought AR's "gay cure" explains how the group's leaders admitted that the founder took his own life. (May 2010) (more...)
• Village Voice ad from 1962.   The Aesthetic Realists deny that they're a cult in this ancient ad they bought in the Village Voice.  This shows that people were saying they were a cult as far back as 1962!  There are some more juicy bits, too.  (May 2010) (more...)
• The Hypocrisy of the Aesthetic Realists.   Continuing my new series of calling a spade a spade, I list several examples of how the AR people are guilty of what they complain about in others — such as being full of hate, writing anonymously, and proffering falsehoods as though they were true. (May 2010) (more...)
• Directed Origination -- AR's favorite mind control trick. How does a group actually get its hooks into someone's mind? Here's an exposé about AR's favorite trick. (Feb. 2010) (more...)
• Five Reasons You Can't Trust an Aesthetic Realist. For starters, most of them eventually leave.  Today's zealot is tomorrow's ex-member. See this and four other reasons. (Feb. 2010) (more...)
• Lies Aesthetic Realists tell. For the first six years I ran this site, I avoided using the "L" word (lie), preferring to just describe their dishonesty without using that particular pejorative. But their dishonesty is just so pervasive and extreme that the gloves are finally off. (Feb. 2010) (more...)
• "The Moonies of poetry". I just found an old article from Harper's (1982) with some choice words about the Aesthetic Realists. Of course, whenever the media looks at AR, their conclusion is rarely favorable. (April 2009) (more...)
• AR's double-page ad in the NY Times. The Aesthetic Realists probably blew close to a third of a million dollars on a double-page ad in the NY Times in 1990. They used that opportunity to tell the world that their founder, Eli Siegel, was "the greatest man in the history of the world". (April 2009) (more...)
• Aesthetic Realism glossary. We explain the real meanings behind AR's loaded language. (April 2009) (more...)
• Updated the "Cult Aspects of AR page". Added lots more examples and sources. (April 2009) (more...)
• Transcript of a secret AR meeting. This might be the ultimate AR scandal, a transcript of an inquest of a person who didn't stay "cured" of his homosexuality. (March 2009) (more...)
• Help for journalists - Media FAQ. After answering a lot of the same questions for reporters -- and seeing how the AR people are trying to mislead them -- I put together a page to help reporters covering AR stories (more...)
• AR gets public funding -- and we get it canceled. AR was able to finagle a grant from the NY state budget. After we alerted the media it looks like the funding has been pulled. (more...)
• Current AR member finally admits AR founder Eli Siegel killed himself! Do you suppose they'll now stop calling me a liar for saying that's what happened? Somehow I doubt it. (more...)

See the rest of the updates.

 

What's on this site
Cult Aspects What is Aesthetic Realism? An explanation about both the AR philosophy and the group that promotes it. Cult aspects of Aesthetic Realism Fanatical devotion to the leader, cutting off relations with families who aren't also believers -- it's all here. AR and Homosexuality The AR group used to try to "cure" people of being gay. They stopped that in 1990 because high-profile success cases kept deciding they were gay after all and leaving. AR has never said their gay-changing attempts were wrong. AR's founder killed himself AR's founder Eli Siegel killed himself, but the AR people have been trying to hide that fact. They can't hide any more, since enough former students have come forward to confirm the truth. Attempts to recruit schoolchildren Some AR members are public schoolteachers, and yep, they do try to recruit in the classroom. Mind control tricks This article explains AR's use of Directed Origination, a classic tool for brainwashing. Also see the article where someone infiltrated the group to learn about their mind control methods. Five reasons you can't trust an Aesthetic Realist One reason is that most people who were in AR eventually woke up and got out. See more about this, plus four other reasons. Lies Aesthetic Realists tell They say they never saw homosexuality as something to cure. They say the leader didn't kill himself. They say my family left the group when I was an infant. These and more are debunked here. Hypocrisy of the Aesthetic Realists It takes some serious brainwashing for the members to not realize that they're guilty of what they accuse others of. Aesthetic Realism glossary We explain the real meanings behind the loaded language that AR people use.	AR in their own words Actual AR advertisment The AR people spent a third of a million dollars for a double-page ad in the NY Times to tell the world that the press' refusal to cover AR is just as wrong as letting hungry people starve to death. Ad for the gay cure AR bought huge ads in major newspapers to trumpet their ability to "fix" gays. Actual letters from AR people When a theater critic casually dissed Aesthetic Realism in New York magazine, the AR people responded with hundreds of angry letters, calling the article "a crime against humanity". Actual internal meeting The AR people blunderingly made a tape recording of a secret meeting they had, where they lambasted a member who had supposedly been "cured" of his gayness, but then found to still be cruising for gay sex. Their screeching hostility towards him is matched only by their fear that the secret will get out. Actual AR consultation For the first time the public can see what really happens in an Aesthetic Realism "consultation" (thanks to a former member sharing his tape with us). In the session the AR counselors tried to help the member not be gay, explaining that the path to ex-gayness was to express deep gratitude to AR and its founder. Actual AR lesson I had a lesson with the cult leader, Eli Siegel, when I was two years old, which, like everything else, they made a tape of. The highlight is Siegel taunting me with "Cry some more, Michael, cry some more!" Ad in the Village Voice from 1962 The AR folks try to deny that they're a cult in this ancient ad -- showing that people were calling them a cult as far back as 1962! AR responds to this website The AR people have tried to rebut this website with their own site called Countering the Lies, whose title ought to win some kind of award for irony. Here we explain the story behind that site.
What former members say Aesthetic Realism exposed The ultimate statement by a former member, who was involved for well over a decade. A tale of getting sucked in. This former member describes exactly how he initially got drawn in, and how he then kept getting more and more involved. Growing up in a cult. An ex-member who was born into AR tells what it was like growing up in the group, and how she got out. Aesthetic Realism ruined his marriage. "I consider my 'study' of Aesthetic Realism to be one of the factors that led to the eventual breakup of my marriage, to my eternal sorrow." On having all the answers. A former member explains how AR members think they have all the answers, and feel qualified to lecture others about how they should view personal tragedy. Kicked out for remaining gay. A former student describes how he was kicked out of AR because he couldn't change from homosexuality. "If I disappointed them, then I now consider that a badge of honor." A former member tells how AR try to change him from being gay, and convinced him not to spend Christmas with his family. "...people were controlled and humiliated if they stepped out of line...". The experiences shared with us by a member from 1974-80, now a Fortune 100 executive. "I want Ellen Reiss questioned!" This former member wonders why there hasn't been a class-action lawsuit against the foundation yet. They took his consultation tape. Describes how the AR people kept his consultation tape with his most intimate thoughts on it, and told him he couldn't study any more unless he incorporated AR more radically into his life. "There isn't any question: Eli Siegel killed himself." A former member who had sought AR's "gay cure" explains how the group's leaders admitted that the founder took his own life. Confirms all the criticism. A former member from 1971-80, confirms that AR students don't see their families, are discouraged from attending college, and shun other members. He also offers that he was mistaken when he was involved about thinking that AR had changed him from homosexuality. Michael Bluejay's description. Your webmaster describes his own family's involvement. Members interviewed in Jewish Times. This lengthy article in Jewish Times quotes former students of Aesthetic Realism extensively. NY Post article. A series of articles in the NY Post quotes many former members who are now critical of the group. Aesthetic Realism debunked. A former student explains the cult aspects of AR. Posted on Steve Hassan's Freedom of Mind website. Other Goodies Thinking of leaving AR? If you're thinking of leaving the group, you're not alone. Let's face it: Most people who have ever studied AR have left -- and not come back. There's got to be a reason for that. Curious about what they figured out? Worried about the fallout if you do decide to leave? Here's everything you need to know. Recovering from your AR experience. People who leave cults often need special therapy to cope with what they went through. Whether you decide to seek counseling or choose to go it alone, here's what you need to know. Media Reports NY Mag called AR "a cult of messianic nothingness" and Harper's referred to them as "the Moonies of poetry". We've got reprints of articles, plus some help for journalists researching AR. (And here are shortcuts to the landmark articles in New York Native, the NY Post and Jewish Times.) Site News / Blog Here's some news and commentary that I add from time to time.

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Photo of Eli Siegel's gravestone from Find A Grave